The divorce rate is dropping in Benton County.

Standing at 4.4 percent in 1996, the rate slid to 3.9 percent in 2000, which over the five years represents an 11.3 percent change between the percentage rates.

Those figures from the state's Center for Health Statistics are good news to area ministers who five years ago promised to invest the time and resources necessary to prepare couples for their wedding day and a long-lasting marriage. To them, the numbers represent real people and entire families that have been spared from the tragedy of divorce.

"We're not trying to claim that our efforts alone are responsible for the drop in divorces, but we are pleased and encouraged," said Ken Himes, a professional marriage counselor and executive director of Friends of the Family Ministries. "We like to feel we're at least contributing to the situation."

More than 60 clergy members from Corval-lis and Philo-math signed a Commun-ity Marriage Preparation Policy on Valentine's Day 1997. The first of its kind in the state, the policy states ministers will encourage engaged couples to spend at least four months attending premarital counseling sessions with a pastor, establishing a relationship with a marriage mentor couple, and complete a personality and relationship assessment.

Those who participate in the community policy feel like they're on the right track, especially when they compare the drop in Benton County's figures with the divorce rate statewide, which increased from 4.7 percent in 1996 to 4.8 percent in 2000.

Himes said the statistics are significant because the greatest number of divorces occur within the first few years of a marriage. If engaged couples can identify potential areas of conflict and learn better skills to deal with them, they're less likely to be in this group, Himes said.

Policy details

Research has shown the tests used in premarital counseling can predict with 70 percent to 80 percent accuracy which couples are likely to divorce. They lead to important discussions of such issues as family backgrounds, in-laws, finances, sex, children, parenting and the expectations each has of marriage. Couples who work through points of agreement and disagreement discovered in the personal surveys during premarital counseling sessions with a minister can then enter marriage with more confidence.

A few pastors reported experiences with couples that learned through counseling that they weren't ready to marry and canceled their wedding. Most people find the sessions to be helpful, they said.

The Rev. Gregg Strawn of the Circle Church of Christ said marriage preparation takes a lot of time for all those involved. He averages eight to 10 hours with each couple over four to five meetings.

"But without question, the extra time is worth it," he said. "It really helps them to consider things that oftentimes they hadn't thought about before. For me, it feels like I'm giving them a useful gift - at the end of our time together we have a deepened relationship, and I've been able to bring them a word from God."

The Rev. Andy Buchanan, pastor at Northwest Hills Baptist Church, reported many of the couples he's counseled say they realized how helpful premarital counseling was to them after their wedding.

"Some who had been married a few years, happily married, said they wished they had paid more attention or wished that they could go through the preparation all over again. They at least remembered the basics of what we had discussed and were trying to apply them to their marriages," he said.

Himes said the pastors have offered lots of positive feedback. Having a community policy to fall back on has strengthened their position in recommending couples go through the counseling and sometimes given them more freedom to turn down weddings they don't feel good about.

According to a Gallup poll taken last year, 88 percent of 20- to 29-year-olds believe "there is a special person, a soul mate

, waiting for me somewhere out there." The latest information released by the U.S. Census Bureau shows Americans remain sold on the idea of marriage - nine out of 10 adults are expected to marry, a trend that's held steady for a century. Census information, however, also points out nearly half of all new marriages will dissolve.

As ministers carry out the community marriage policy, they're trying to help people overcome those odds, Himes said. "We're not trying to put hurdles in a couple's way - we're trying to help them deal with reality so they can fulfill their dreams. We're giving them tools to succeed at marriage."

Looking ahead

Even though the Community Marriage Preparation Policy is proving successful, Himes is not yet satisfied. In other American cities where community marriage policies have been adopted, divorce rates have dropped between 30 and 47 percent.

Eleven other communities in Oregon have followed Benton County's lead in establishing marriage policies, now called Marriage and Family Agreements, and six more are in the process of developing one. Himes wants to see the policies become a statewide effort.

Friends of the Family has just established a new program, the Marriage and Families Project, to help promote the marriage movement in Oregon and sponsor training events for pastors and communities interested in Marriage and Family Agreements.

Himes explained "the kids" really drive him to put so much time and energy into his effort. A minimum of 8,200 children younger than 18 lived in Oregon households affected by divorce in 2000, with 147 in Benton County.

Referring to the vast amounts of research showing the negative impacts of divorce on children even into their adult years, Himes said the important thing is the marital success of couples and the quality of family life. The success of the community marriage policy in the Corvallis area, as well as anywhere else, is not just in lower divorce rates.

"If we can protect kids by giving their moms and dads solid relationships, that's a good thing," he said.

Carol Reeves covers religion for the Gazette-Times. She can be reached by e-mail at reevesc@gtconnect.com or by phone at 758-9516.