Well folks, three weeks of voting is done and your votes have been tallied. What follows is the list of top spots in Albany, Corvallis, Philomath and Lebanon as selected by, well, you. If you don’t see your favorite store, eatery, location, entertainment venue or entertainer listed here, then come back next year and cast your vote, or forever hold your peace.

In the meantime, congratulations to the businesses that won top honors in our first Top of the Valley, and congratulations to you for picking such a beautiful, culturally-alive location to live. As the below list proves, there is no shortage of great things to do, see, taste, hear and just all around experience in the mid-valley.

Stores

Salon/Spa

Let’s be frank. These days, your haircut is the least of your worries. Better you obsess about the color and curl of your mane, and the shape and tone of your toenails. And did we mention waxing? Yeah, because the urban Yeti look is soooo last year. Or maybe not. Now, more than ever, a salon is a place to sculpt your body whole, whatever style you choose, and to be pampered into a state of drooling ecstasy while you do it. Top of the Valley: Retreat Day Spa & Salon, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Oak Street Salon, Lebanon.

Antique Store

For those of you who prefer furniture with a pedigree, Top of the Valley is Beekman’s Place in Corvallis. Top of Linn County: The group of stores along First Avenue, which includes Arlene’s Victorian Rose Antiques, Camas Creek Antiques, Clockwise and Pastime Antiques.

Furniture Store

Apparently we like furniture here in the mid-valley: The contest for furniture store attracted a good number of votes. In the final tally, Blackledge Furniture narrowly edged The Inkwell Home Store for Top of the Valley honors. Top of Linn County: At Home Furniture.

Women’s Clothing

When it comes to feminine apparel, service and price are evidently just as important as the actual duds being slung. Who knew? Whether you’re shopping for your mom, your significant other or yourself, you not only want something flattering, but you actually want to be able to eat for the rest of the month after buying it. Not wanting to kick yourself for giving your money to somebody who made you feel bad for being curvier than Kate Moss wouldn’t be bad, either. Top of the Valley: Sibling Revelry, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Old Navy, Albany. Honorable Mention: The Clothes Tree, Corvallis.

Men’s Clothing

The classics never go out of style. Period. If you’ve got to dress the part of the professional, nothing tops a good suit. For those casual days, which is every day for some of us, a boot-cut or straight-leg pair of jeans and a well-fitting T-shirt or long-sleeved button-up is all you need. Well, shoes and socks wouldn’t hurt, either, especially if you plan on leaving the house. Flip-flopping isn’t just ill-advised in politics. Regardless of your stance on open-toed footwear, however, several local men’s shops are getting tough on fashion crimes. Top of the Valley: Melhaf’s Men’s Clothiers, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Ross Dress For Less, Albany. Honorable Mention: Goodwill.

Children’s Clothing

Parents and kids don’t always agree on what makes for great kids’ clothing. That short skirt your daughter saw somebody wearing in Cosmopolitan, for instance, might not be your idea of appropriate kids’ wear. Sometimes, however, a pleasing price tag can be all that really matters when it comes to keeping your children clothed. In this day and age, keeping your kids off MySpace can take all the time you have. They’re on their own when it comes to getting dressed. Top of the Valley: Kid Shop, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Old Navy, Albany. Honorable Mention: All About Kids, Corvallis.

Bicycle Shop

Top of the Valley: Corvallis Cyclery, with a narrow victory over Peak. Top of Linn County: Morgan’s Bike and Lock was the favorite.

DVD/Video Rentals

It’s all about selection, selection, selection. In the age of Netflix, when you can order anything you want and keep it as long as you want, the only way for your local DVD rental shop to compete is to have what the customer wants — RIGHT NOW. Whether we watch action or drama or horror or comedy, we all have one thing in common: A very short attention span. So to all the rental specialists, hear our creed: Have it ready when we walk through the door, or we’re ordering it on pay per view. Top of the Valley: Hollywood Video, Corvallis and Albany. Honorable Mention: DVD World, Corvallis.

Tattoo/Piercing

They say that diamonds are forever, but really, nothing says forever like an ink-laden needle plunging through the upper layers of your skin again and again. Think that Tasmanian Devil tattoo you got when you were 15 is still going to seem cool when your kid asks you what that indistinct brown blob is on your bicep? Or what about that lower back tattoo you got because it looked good with half shirts? The point is, out of all the shops on this list, you better trust your tattoo artist, or piercing professional, to get it right the first time, and perhaps even make sure you really want what you think you want when you walk through the doors. Top of the Valley: Sacred Art Tattoo, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: holEy cow Body Piercing, Corvallis.

Gallery

Running a gallery is no joke. You have to keep the artists happy by showing off their work, and you have to keep the public coming back with inviting ambiance and an impressive selection. Plus, you have to do both those things in a world where half the public thinks that the paintings of Thomas Kincaid constitute high art. The other half, of course, gets by with posters of Munch’s “The Scream” they bought at a traveling sale in the campus quad. So this goes out to the galleries doing things the right way — showing and/or selling great art to satisfied customers and promoting culture with gala events and eye-catching displays. Top of the Valley: Pegasus Gallery, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: ArtCentric, Corvallis.

Comics/Gaming Shop

The old stereotype of comics and card or role-playing games being just for dorks is all but dead. With comics breaking through into mainstream cinema, and even the cool kids occasionally indulging in a little Magick, the comic and gaming industry has moved out of the geek ghetto and into the retail mainstream. Still, the hallmarks of a good comic shop remain the same: A great selection, enough action figures and figurines to recreate the Civil War and stacks upon teetering stacks of lurid and heroic imagery. Having dungeon masters worth their weight in geldings behind the counter doesn’t hurt, either. Top of the Valley: Matt’s Cavalcade of Comics, Corvallis.

Bookstore

Even in the age of Borders, B. Dalton’s and Barnes & Noble, the small bookstore can still survive with knowledgeable employees, a great selection and a few comfy nooks. Oh yeah, enough coffee to keep you awake all the way through Robert Jordan’s “Wheel of Time” series can’t hurt either. So where do locals go to get their literacy on? Top of the Valley: Grass Roots Books & Music, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: The Book Bin, Corvallis.

Music Retail

The CD market is a lot like the DVD market in that you better darn well have what the customer is looking for right at the moment they’re looking for it. Either that, or you can win them over with employees that can talk about their favorite Eric Dolphy record, the high point of Tropicalia or the low point of hair metal. Either way, the music retail store is up against fierce competition from both the Internet and CD burners, which means being successful in this game is trickier than finding a song that doesn’t degrade women on late-night BET. Top of the Valley: Grass Roots Books & Music, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Fred Meyer, Albany. Honorable Mention: Happy Trails Records, Corvallis.

Musical Instruments

Who do you go to when you need someone that knows the difference between a tuba and a Sousaphone? Who can you call to find out what separates a phase pedal from a flange pedal? Where do you go when you want to say Zildjian without some smartass saying “Bless you”? The answer to all these questions and more is your local musical instrument retailer, or for all you banjo players out there, the shiny place with the strings. Top of the Valley: Gracewinds Music, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Magnolia Audio and Music, Albany. Honorable Mention: Bullfrog Music, Corvallis.

Grocery Store

Apparently, we like to eat in the mid-valley as well: In another race that attracted a number of votes, First Alternative in Corvallis narrowly edged Richey’s Market to claim the Top of the Valley title. Top of Linn County: Safeway.

Convenience Store

When you need to grab just a couple of items on your way home or to the office, when you want to pick up a cup of coffee or (WARNING: SELF-SERVING STATEMENT COMING RIGHT UP) the newspaper, a convenience store is just the ticket — dash in, dash out, you’re back on the road. This was another tight race between a number of different contenders, but when the dust settled, the Top of the Valley was: Dari-Mart. Top of Linn County: 7-Eleven. Honorable Mention went to First Alternative.

Life & Entertainment

Band

Different strokes for different folks, or different beats for different freaks. Either way you look at it, we all want something slightly different when it comes to live music. Perhaps the one thing most of us have in common is a desire to be able to move to it, whether that means doing that weird hippie arm-swirling thing, knocking into each other like human bumper cars or just standing against the wall and giving your neck a Jane Fonda workout. The following bands, evidently then, are the ones that move us, not just to twitch, but to type as well. Top of the Valley: Badfish Band. Honorable Mention: Amadan, The Stack. Special Editor’s Pick: Norman.

Place to Meet Guys/Gals

No! We did not say meat market. We said place to meet guys and gals, better known as men and women, of a respectable sort that would never, ever get tipsy off the malted or distilled spirits and go home with someone they just met. We’re talking about a place where you can meet somebody to hold hands with and go for long walks on the beach. A person you can grow old with or bicker over the extensive prenuptial agreement. The one thing we most certainly did not mean is a meat market. Top of the Valley: Squirrels, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: The Beanery, Albany.

Theater

Despite the movie industry’s endless kvetching about declining receipts, people are still going to the movies. Some of them, however, are just getting a little pickier about what they spend their money on, not to mention who they might have to sit next to after spending it. Movies as diverse as “Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest” and “An Inconvenient Truth” proved once again this summer that if you build a decent theater, and find the right movie to show in it, the people will come. Whether they’ll remember to turn off their cell phones is a whole other question. Top of the Valley: Darkside Cinema, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: The Pix Theater, Albany.

Fairgrounds Event

OK, so perhaps the county fair has a bit of an advantage on this one, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t have some stiff competition. Unfortunately, no competition is stiff enough to beat rodeo, rides and the reaper (As in “Don’t Fear,” as in Blue Oyster Cult). So kudos to you, Sheep Dog Trials, you did your best. Sadly, until you learn to rope a calf, make kids vomit or play the guitar solo from “Burnin’ For You,” you’ve got your work cut out for you. Top of the Valley: Benton County Fair. Top of Linn County: Sheep Dog Trials.

Skateboarding

To think that back when skateboarding first got off the ground as a pastime, skaters used to have to find abandoned houses to sneak into and ride their pools. Today, the mid-valley’s got several skateparks to choose from, and while that might take away from the outlaw charm of the whole endeavor, it sure makes it a lot easier to actually skate. Top of the Valley: Corvallis Skate Park. Top of Linn County: Albany Skate Park.

Concert Venue

Every concert venue has at least three things in common: somebody playing music, somebody watching the music being played and somebody, usually drunk, yelling “Play ‘Free Bird!’” While those three things almost never change, just about everything else can, from whether the venue serves alcohol or coffee, is indoors or outdoors, or hosts rock, jazz, country, hip-hop or death metal. One mid-valley venue has hosted most of those in a beautiful outdoor setting and best of all, it gives the music away for free. Top of the Valley, Monteith Riverpark, Albany. Top of Benton County: The LaSells Stewart Center.

Restaurant Service

They might not fan you with peacock feathers while feeding you grapes and nimbly plucking at a lyre, but a restaurant that excels at customer service should make you feel like royalty nonetheless. Perhaps everybody knows your name, perhaps the bartender knows your drink, or maybe they just make sure you get seated away from the table of college students. Either way, this goes out to the restaurants that know how to treat their customers. Top of the Valley: Big River Restaurant, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Red Robin, Albany. Honorable Mention: Sybaris, Albany; and Iovino’s Restaurant and China Delight, both in Corvallis.

Mascot

It’s a runaway: Oregon State’s Benny Beaver, using his powerful tail and, uh, his powerful teeth, smashed and gnawed his foes in this category to claim laurels as Top of the Valley. We’d write more, but suddenly we’re getting hungry.

Things You Love About the Mid-Valley

We don’t want to give away the answer just yet, but it probably won’t surprise you to learn that you just need to look outside to discover the No. 1 thing we love about living here. Top of the Valley: It’s the environment, silly, that beautiful show of nature all around us, even when it rains — well, technically the rain is part of the environment, a natural occurrence, so we must love that, too. Good thing. Runner-up was the “small-town” feel that Corvallis, Albany and the rest of the mid-valley boast. No other answer came close.

Best Protest

Movie fans, name the movie that contains this bit of immortal dialogue: “What are you protesting against?” “Whaddaya got?” Top of the Valley: The long-running protest against the war in Iraq that’s set up shop outside the Benton County Courthouse. Honorable Mention: The effort to call attention to water-quality issues in the Willamette River.

Best Parade

Everyone loves a parade, and the bigger, the better. Which means that the mid-valley’s biggest parade romped to an easy victory in this category. Top of the Valley: The Veterans Day parade in Albany. Top of Benton County: The kinetic sculpture parade that’s a highlight of da Vinci Days. Honorable Mention: Those July 4 parades that pop up through the mid-valley — typically on, well, July 4.

Best Athletic Field

When it sells out, the mid-valley’s top athletic field is about the same size, in terms of population, as Albany. And on those sold-out dates, it would be the 12th-largest city in the state. Top of the Valley: Reser Stadium. Go Beavs!

Best Spectator Sport

It takes a special event to pry us away from our couches and our state-of-the-art TVs n you have to, you know, get dressed and maybe comb the hair and brush the teeth. It takes a special event to do all that. You can’t do that for just any old event. So, the Top of the Valley: Oregon State football. And remember: You just can’t go wrong wearing orange and black. Soccer — college, high school and youth in both Benton and Linn counties — ranked second in this category. Two other OSU sports, gymnastics and baseball, earned honorable mentions.

Speed Trap

We weren’t sure whether to call this category “Best Speed Trap” or “Worst Speed Trap,” so we’ll let you make that distinction. In any event, two spots tied for Top of the Valley status: Third Street and West Hills Road, both in Corvallis. Honorable (or dishonorable) Mention: Highway 34.

Public Art

Love it or hate it — and, typically, we find that people are rarely lukewarm about public art — there’s no denying that it helps to give communities their distinctive flavors. And public art often is a good place to launch a discussion of that evergreen question: What is art? Top of the Valley is the public art in Riverfront Park in Corvallis. Top of Linn County is the poetry that now adorns the sign on the old Midway Drive-In sign. (See, we told you a “What is Art” debate would break out here.) Cassie the Dog in Corvallis earned an honorable mention. Good dog!

Dog Walking

See, this is why many of us prefer cats. Top of the Valley: Willamette Park. Top of Linn County: The riverfront area. Honorable Mention: Woodland Meadows, Corvallis.

Garage Sales

We know many of you spend your weekends bouncing from garage sale to garage sale, folded-up copy of the newspaper under your arms, looking for that one super deal that will put a perfect end to your week. On behalf of the newspaper, let us just say that we love you for that. Your Top of the Valley spot for garage sales: The Timberhill area in Corvallis.

Kid-Friendly

So maybe the old Pink Floyd song is wrong and the kids do need an education. Top of the Valley: Corvallis-Benton County and Albany Public Libraries.

Public Restroom

When you’re window shopping downtown and all the signs read “Restroom for customer use only,” this is extremely valuable information to have. Top of the Valley: Riverfront Park, Corvallis.

Location

Bar for Music

Perhaps it’s no coincidence that the best bar for music in town, according to our readers, is the one that most often hosts the top band in town. It probably doesn’t hurt that it has a mean selection of Mexican and Southwestern cuisine, and if packing people in like sardines makes the music feel that much more intense, it’s surprising more of its patrons don’t suffer heart attacks. Top of the Valley: Bombs Away Cafe, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: Big River, Corvallis, and The Union, Corvallis.

Date Restaurant

There are few things more important to your romantic life than being able to name a list of good date restaurants. You could take your date to Hooters, but unless you’re a girl and he’s a guy, and a dumb one at that, you’re getting Nexted like a person with a polysyllabic vocabulary on MTV. There are some date restaurant staples that will never die — dim lights, good wine and soft music are among them — but few places that combine all these into a potion so potent that a second date is guaranteed. Top of the Valley: Big River, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Sybaris, Albany. Honorable Mention: Iovino’s Restaurant, Corvallis.

Place to Propose

Along with the trend of weddings being moved out of churches and into the outdoors, it turns out that the top places to pop the question are scenic natural vistas, as well. Top of the Valley: the beach. Honorable mention: Marys Peak, Bald Hill.

Winery

Sometimes, just sometimes, the perfect combination of grapes comes together to make an elixir so perfect, so delectable, that to say no would be folly of the worst kind. No, we’re not talking about the kids that picked Sunny D over the purple stuff, aka grape drink, in the infamous TV commercials. It’s all about great wine, and yes, we would like some cheese with that. Thanks very much. Our top vineyard this year is not only known for the fruit of its labor, but for hosting legendary concerts, elegant dinners and respected art displays, to boot. Top of the Valley: Tyee Wine Cellars, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: Willamette Valley Vineyards, Turner, and Eola Hills, Rickreall.

Place to Dance

Ain’t no mountain high enough. Ain’t no valley low enough. Ain’t no dance floor wide enough. A great sound system is a nice touch, too. Add some of the hottest Latin dancing in town, dim lights and a huge selection of drinks, and you’ve got a formula for mega bootie propulsion that Nile Rogers would have given his rhythm hand for. Top of the Valley: Platinum, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: Tom’s Peacock, Corvallis.

Family Day Trip

The Pacific Coast. It’s not really part of the valley, so we felt odd slapping that Top of the Valley label on it. The honorable mention goes to Silver Falls Park.

Nature Hike

One of the great things about the mid-valley, as you were remarking earlier, is the wide variety of outdoors activities that are literally not more than a few minutes’ drive (or hike or ride) away, regardless of where you might be. Top of the Valley: McDonald Research Forest. Bald Hill Trail and Marys Peak won honorable mentions.

Bridge

Such a wide range of bridges that you could choose from. In the end, though, your favorite bridge is one that you can’t actually drive to n unless you work for OSU or a law-enforcement agency. Top of the Valley: Irish Bend Covered Bridge on the OSU campus. Honorable Mention: The spectacular Newport Bay Bridge in Newport — which, again, is not technically part of the mid-valley, but we trust your collective judgment on this one. Oddly enough, not many votes for the Marys River Bridge, but the voting closed before the GT started to push that whole “cursed” angle.

Back Road

Cue your favorite Bruce Springsteen song here, and zip down the road you named Best of the Valley: Peoria Road. Hey! Slow down, leadfoot! Maybe you should put something else on the stereo. Bellfountain Road won the honorable mention crown.

Best Place to

Take Parents

Again, not to call into question your collective judgment, but your preferred place to take the parents actually is not in the mid-valley. That’s OK, though: We took our parents here as well. Top of the Valley: The Oregon coast.

Trail

Top of the Valley: Bald Hill Trail. McDonald Research Forest won the honorable mention.

Golf Course

Next year, we’ll ask for your favorite golf HOLE in the mid-valley, so take some notes this year, and we’ll pull together an 18-hole best of the mid-valley golf course. Top of the Valley: Trysting Tree. Top of Linn County: Spring Hill Country Club. Honorable Mention: Corvallis Country Club.

Place to Watch People

The magnetic pull of flowing water makes riverfront parks in both Albany and Corvallis the best place to watch people, in your judgment. The downside here, of course, is that you have to stop looking at the water long enough to pay attention to people. Honorable mention went to the mid-valley’s various farmers’ markets.

Best View

Top of the Valley: Marys Peak, where on a clear day you can see maybe not forever, but why would you want to see any more? Honorable Mention: Chip Ross Park.

Park

Maybe it’s the dinosaur bones or the phantom train engine, but either way, one park haunts local residents. Top of the Valley: Avery Park. Top of Linn County: Riverfront area.

People

Actor

George Burns once said, “Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.” So perhaps to be a great actor, you simply need to be a conman, or woman, who exalts in the attention of an audience. Different kinds of acting require different talents. Comic acting involves an impeccable sense of timing. Dramatic acting is all about breaking the lines up and accenting the right syllables. No matter what kind of acting you’re doing, however, if you’re not a good salesman, or woman, nobody’s going to buy it. In the case of improvisation, you’ve got to think fast and sometimes, when the audience comes up with a particularly difficult suggestion, sell a clunky refrigerator of a concept to the chilly Eskimo of the audience’s reception. Top of the Valley: Jean Bonifas, Springboard Improv Theater. Honorable Mention: Marza Warsinski and Robert Hirsch of Scott Palmer’s “Romeo and Juliet.”

Director

No actor ever crafts a brilliant performance without the help of a good director, and a good theater director doesn’t have luxuries such as saying “Cut!” in the middle of a performance or going back and cutting out the boom mike if it dangles into the top of a scene. When the show opens, the sets and blocking and acting all have to be perfect, or you’re going to lose your audience quicker than a Super Bowl halftime show. Top of the Valley: Mary Jean Reynales, Corvallis Community Theatre. Honorable Mention: Scott Palmer, Oregon State University Theater.

Teacher

As journalists, we might not sympathize with teachers for being underpaid, but you’d have to be a hard-hearted human being to ignore the strength it takes to deal with children and teens in the grip of hormonal armageddon five days a week and not lose your mind, let alone prepare engaging lesson plans. Top of the Valley: Jim Slusser, Central Linn School District. Honorable Mention, Carole Beedlow, Corvallis High School.

Bartender

Part pourer, part mixer, part server, part counselor and all customer service representative, it’s amazing that bartenders can juggle all the bottles, taps, glasses and money that passes through their hands. When you consider that alcohol reduces inhibitions, reducing those who consume it to their natural states of obnoxiousness, it’s a miracle the bartenders don’t smash those bottles over the bar and rush at their customers like a cast member from “West Side Story” on a regular basis. That they resist that temptation with a smile is the mortal equivalent of turning water into wine. Top of the Valley: Crew at Squirrels, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: Sarah Shook of Iovino’s Restaurant, Corvallis.

Server

Some days it seems that the fine art of customer service is disappearing faster than a case of Smirnoff Ice on Ladies Night. If you’re one of those people who leaves $5 on a $95 tab, though, you deserve to get treated like a leper. If a waiter or waitress truly excels at service, they’re probably not going to give you what you deserve even then. They’re going to make sure you go away happy, then write down your name from the credit card receipt, find out where you live and take their revenge in their own sweet time. Or at least they should. Fortunately for you cheapskates out there, most servers are better people than those they serve. For proof, see the following list. Top of the Valley: Alma Yenchik, New Morning Bakery, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: Jessie Brown of Sybaris, Albany.

Musician

The job title musician can encompass so many duties: composer, arranger, teacher, performer, songwriter and just all around showman. And that’s assuming you’re willing to think of being a musician as a job in the first place. Our readers have chosen as their top musician a man who does all those things and still manages to run a Web site where other musicians can download virtual trumpet loops to enhance their own sonic landscapes. Top of the Valley: Jazz musician Rob Birdwell of The Blowholes. Honorable Mention: Folk musician Jon ten Broek and comedic songwriter Neal Gladstone.

College Athlete

Guts and glory: You gave the crown here to one of the standout players on Oregon State’s plucky national-championship baseball team. Top of the Valley: OSU pitcher Kevin Gunderson, but it could have gone to any number of OSU baseball heroes.

College Coach

Top of the Valley: OSU baseball coach Pat Casey. Football coach Mike Riley came in second.

Professor

Top of the Valley: OSU English professor Kerry Ahearn came in tops in the poll.

Artist

Anybody who saw last year’s “Art School Confidential” knows that making it in the world of fine art can literally be murder. That was set in New York, a city that actually tends to appreciate great works of art. Now imagine trying to ply your craft in the mid-valley, which although it has a high number of cultured individuals considering its population density, still falls into the category of “not New York.” The top painter for our humble area has taught at Oregon State University and shown in galleries all around the Northwest, including our own top gallery, Pegasus. Top of the Valley: Yuji Hiratsuka. Honorable Mention: Tom Allen.

Author

It’s been said that our winning author tells stories like secrets but if that’s the case, her readers can’t keep one. An OSU professor and author of a collection of essays and two collections of short stories, our reader’s favorite writer doesn’t just weave tales, but disproves the notion that “those who can, do and those who can’t, teach.” Clearly, there’s no need to choose between them, and teaching can be every bit as satisfying a way of practicing your craft as actually doing it. Top of the Valley: Marjorie Sandor. Honorable Mention: Linda Crew.

Bouncer

Instead of telling you what it takes to be a great bouncer, we offer the following list of quotes from “Road House,” the 1989 movie starring Patrick Swayze as the ultimate cooler in the bouncing game. We’re not saying they’re applicable, just totally sweet. “Pain Don’t Hurt.” “Nobody ever wins a fight.” “All you have to do is follow three simple rules. One, never underestimate your opponent. Expect the unexpected. Two, take it outside. Never start anything inside the bar unless it’s absolutely necessary. And three, be nice.” “I want you to be nice until it’s time to not be nice.” Top of the Valley: James Alford of Tom’s Peacock, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: Red from the Peacock and Chip from Platinum.

Journalist

He swears he didn’t stuff the ballot box, but we’ll never know for sure. Top of the Valley: Entertainer editor Jake TenPas. Top of Linn County: Democrat-Herald editor Hasso Hering.

Public Official

You split your votes here among local and statewide figures; more impressively, the votes went to Democrats, Republicans and nonpartisan souls alike. Top of the Valley: Retiring Corvallis Mayor Helen Berg. U.S. Rep. Peter DeFazio came in second, and gubernatorial candidate (and Albany’s favorite son) Ron Saxton finished third.

Police Officer

Top of the Valley: Luther MacLean, one of the Corvallis Police Department’s finest. Runner-up: Benton County Sheriff Jim Swinyard.

Firefighter

Top of the Valley: Michael Kincade of the Lebanon Fire Department.

Food and Drink

Burger

Seems like a simple thing, making the perfect burger, but if that’s the case, then how come so many fast food restaurants can’t come close to getting it right. All you really need is good, high-quality beef, ketchup and mustard, lettuce, onions and maybe a slice of vine-ripened tomato. You’ll also need a bun substantial enough to hold all that inside, and if you really want to get creative, as our winner does, you might throw in a slice of ham and a fried egg. Really, what did your arteries ever do for you? Top of the Valley: Squirrels, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: Burgerville, Albany, and McMenamin’s, Corvallis. Special Editor’s Pick: Paul’s Place, Philomath.

Milkshake

As if the burger and the fries weren’t fatty enough, some people feel the need to pile in a thick, creamy milkshake on top of all that. They’re called geniuses. Much like a burger, a milkshake should be a simple thing to make. Take ice cream, mix with milk and fruit or other flavor and mix thoroughly. Of course, all milkshakes are not created equal, and some have risen to the Top of the Valley like the cherry on top of the, well, you know. Top of the Valley: Burgerville, Albany. Top of Benton County: Jamie’s Great Hamburgers, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: Albright and Raw Pharmacy, Corvallis.

Seafood

If it smells like fish, you probably shouldn’t eat it. That’s pretty much the golden rule of seafood, the food to eat while it’s fresh and no other way. Evidently, local residents would rather cook it themselves than have it prepared for them, and when they head to the fish market, there’s one place they troll above all others. Top of the Valley: Harry & Anette’s Fresh Fish, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: McGrath’s and Big River, Corvallis.

World Cuisine

This category is in and of itself a hodgepodge. Pretty much anything that isn’t Mexican or Asian cuisine was thrown into the pot and the best rose to the top. From Indian to Hungarian to Mediterranean to French, you named it and we included it. Of course, there’s only room for one at the Top of the Valley, and this year it was the place that serves up the best nan, pakorma, masala, curry and saag around. Top of the Valley: Evergreen Indian Cuisine, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Novak’s Hungarian Paprikas, Albany. Honorable Mention: Le Bistro, Corvallis.

Coffee

Why do we unfairly pick on alcohol and cigarettes as addictive substances when we all know that perhaps the most addictive is right under our noses each and every day? That’s right, coffee, the Pacific Northwest’s beverage version of crack, has insinuated itself into every facet of our life from breakfast to lunch to mid-afternoon snacks and after-dinner pick-me-ups. And we’re most definitely not complaining. In fact, did somebody just say coffee? Who’s up for a coffee run? Top of the Valley: The Beanery, Corvallis and Albany. Honorable Mention: Red Horse Coffee, Corvallis.

Microbrew Pub

Another staple of the Pacific Northwest is the microbrew, that flavorful alternative to the big name beers much of the rest of the country seems content to settle for. As the T-shirt says, life is too short to drink bad beer, which must make the winner in this category be a sort of fountain of youth, in which in hop-laden sip prolongs your life with tastebud tittilation. Top of the Valley: McMenamin’s, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Calapooia Brewing Co. Honorable Mention: Bombs Away Cafe, Corvallis.

French Fry

It’s no mystery why the french fry is America’s most popular food. It’s salty, it’s starchy, it’s hot and crunchy. And darn it, we have to work to keep up our reputation as the world’s most obese country. Those fat cells aren’t going to multiply by themselves, you know. Seriously though, what else will we use as a vehicle to get ketchup, ranch and thousand island dressing to our mouths if not a golden stick of potatoey goodness? Top of the Valley: McMenamin’s, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Red Robin, Albany. Honorable Mention: Squirrels, Corvallis.

Mexican

Somewhere there’s a giant restaurant assembly line stamping out Mexican restaurants. In addition to the tile and toucans and matching margarita glasses, the food really doesn’t seem to differ noticeably, either. Really, how many ways are there to make a taco? Well, for our top Mexican restaurant, the answer is in the double digits. From a range of meats that seems deliciously exotic to our eyes to staples such as black beans and guacamole that just plain put their competition to shame, the sour cream of the Mexican crop serves up traditional cuisine at affordable prices in a cozy mon-and-pop setting. Top of the Valley: Tacos Uruapan, Corvallis. Top of Linn County, Los Dos Amigos, Albany. Honorable Mention: Bombs Away Cafe, Corvallis.

Asian

In the last 20 years, our choices when it comes to eating Asian cuisine have exploded in a variety of different cultural culinary traditions. From Thai to Japanese to Korean to the new Vietnamese joint going in at Timberhill Shopping Center, eating Asian food no longer necessarily means being limited to Chinese. So now you can choose between pot stickers and gyoza, chow mein and yakisoba, spicy mustard and wasabi. Choose wisely. Top of the Valley: Aomatsu, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Ping’s, Albany. Honorable Mention: China Delight, Corvallis.

Cocktail

When it comes to mixing, the world’s best DJ doesn’t have a thing over the world’s best bartender, or even the mid-valley’s best. Whether you’re looking for a simple Jim Beam and Coke, a slightly more complex Harvey Keitel (bourbon, ginger ale and bitters) or the complex potion that is the perfect bloody mary, the following people can make it for you and serve it up in style. Top of the Valley: Big River, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Sybaris, Albany. Honorable Mention: The Crowbar. Special Editor’s Pick: Magenta and Iovino’s Restaurant, Corvallis.

Drive-through

Drive-in restaurants are as rare as a vampire’s steak, but that doesn’t mean we don’t still love good drive-through service. As Ferris Bueller said, “Life moves pretty fast,” and if you don’t stop for a cheeseburger every once in a while, you might just miss it. Top of the Valley: Burgerville, Albany. Top of Benton County: La Conga, Corvallis.

Pizza

Sorry to quote another movie, and not a very good one at that, but in “Threesome,” Stephen Baldwin compares sex to pizza, saying, “Even when it’s bad, it’s still pretty good.” Perhaps that’s a bit of an overstatement in both cases, but it’s pretty hard to go wrong with bubbling melted cheese, tomato sauce and a chewy, crispy crunch. Yet regardless of how hard it is to screw it up, only a handful really know how to take the pizza pie to its full potential, and frankly, we thank them for it. Top of the Valley: American Dream, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Cidicci’s, Albany. Honorable Mention: Woodstock’s and Cirello’s, Corvallis.

Breakfast

Breakfast isn’t a time of day, it’s a state of mind. It doesn’t matter when you eat it, breakfast is always breakfast: golden hashbrowns, a wide variety of eggs, crisp bacon or a tender steak. Or, if you’re not into the whole carnivore thing, Nearly Normal’s will whip up the meanest huevos rancheros between Portland and Eugene. Whatever you’re seeking, one of the following restaurants is frying it up so that you can devour it like greased lightning. Top of the Valley: Sunnyside-Up Cafe, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Elmer’s. Honorable Mention: Sam’s Station. Special Editor’s Pick: Sharon’s Cafe, Corvallis.

Appetizer

Ah, the appetizer: What is more welcome than a plate of beautifully prepared appetizers raced to your table to take the edge off your hunger? Top of the Valley: Big River. Top of Linn County: Applebee’s. Honorable mention: Magenta.

Power Lunch

You’ve heard of dress to impress? Sometimes, you have to pick a restaurant to impress. Top of the Valley: Big River. Honorable mention: Michael’s Landing. Linn County is too busy to have lunch; no restaurants on the east side of the river got votes in this category.

Soup

Campbell’s lied to us growing up. Soup isn’t always good food. Sometimes it’s downright bland, and all the breadbowls in the world aren’t going to make it taste like anything other than flour and water with a sneeze-worth of seasoning in it. When soup is done right, however, it’s everything Campbell’s lead us to believe it could be and more. Call us crazy, but cream of asparagus should actually taste more like asparagus than cream. Top of the Valley: The Soup Shop, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: The Depot, Albany. Honorable Mention: New Morning Bakery, Corvallis.

Salad

Even thought the South Beach and Atkins diet crazes may have died down a bit, their legacy remains that you can get a salad just about anywhere you can get a burger, or water for that matter. When McDonald’s advertises their salads more fervently than their french fries, you know that a corner has been turned in mainstream American food culture. Still, a good salad sets itself apart with fresh ingredients, colorful presentation and dressings that shines on, rather than blotting out, the sun of the lettuce it orbits. Top of the Valley: American Dream Pizza, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Izzy’s Pizza, Albany. Honorable Mention: Big River, Corvallis.

Happy Hour

Happy Hour might just be the most applicably named stretch of time known to man. Whether it’s $1 Pabst or $2 well drinks, if you can’t find something that fits both your wallet and your palate, then you’re trying not to have fun, Mr. Grumpy Pants. Top of the Valley: Bombs Away Cafe, Corvallis. Top of Linn County: Wyatt’s, Albany. Honorable Mention: Magenta, Corvallis.

Sports Bar

It’s an old argument, put into new words. A great sports bar isn’t defined by the size of the television, but rather the emotion that bonds the crowds that join there to watch. Take this year’s winner, for instance. Their television is so small that if you’re sitting at the other end of the room, you’ll need binoculars to tell OSU from UO. But the camaraderie that unites those that gather there to watch the Civil War, or “It’s a Wonderful Life,” is enough to make that set seem like a 50-inch plasma screen. Or maybe it’s just the beer. Top of the Valley: Squirrels, Corvallis. Honorable Mention: Clodfelter’s, Corvallis, and Corvallis Sports Park.

Yin & Yang

Beavers beat out Ducks 66 to 13.

Paper popped plastic 86 to 28.

Environmentalists sawed off loggers 87 to 25.

Democrats voted down republicans 82 to 30.

Coffee buzz bombed tea 73 to 39.

Driving motored past biking 71 to 45.

Wine guzzled down beer 59 to 45.

Fishing reeled in hunting 80 to 11.

Carnivores feasted on herbivores 80 to 32.

MaryAnne left Ginger marooned 61 to 53.

Boxers knocked out briefs 61 to 34.

Debra Arlyn proved that “That Girl” really is her by outperforming Alexis 40 to 17.

— Top of the Valley results compiled by Jake TenPas

and Mike McInally

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