Posted: Saturday, July 12, 2008 12:00 am
Brother to stand by his sister at her wedding today - but not in a dress
By THERESA HOGUE
Gazette-Times reporter
Garnet Alegado and her older brother, Gideon-Mer Alegado, grew up listening to the organ at the First Presbyterian Church in downtown Corvallis, and were baptized in the sanctuary there. On Friday, they were back at their childhood church, draping yards and yards of tulle around the sanctuary in preparation for Garnet's wedding today.
Although seven years apart, Garnet, who is 26, and her brother, who is almost 33, said that they're as close as twins despite the difference in age - and now geography - that separates them. They are Corvallis natives, but Garnet has recently moved to Vancouver, Wash. Her brother and his wife and their new daughter live near Seattle, Wash.
But Gideon will be by her side today as he plays a rather unusual but very important role in the ceremony: Garnet has chosen her brother to be her maid of honor, or rather, her "man-maid of honor," as she's calling him.
It just seemed the natural thing to do after she and Chris Hayes became engaged on Christmas Eve, 2006. She announced the engagement to her family on Christmas Day. Her brother was excited, and asked her if she'd chosen a maid of honor.
"I said 'Yeah, I did; it's you,'" she said.
"It's a testament to our relationship that I didn't bat an eyelid," Gideon said. "Then it occurred to me that I didn't have a dress."
Her decision to make Gideon her maid-of-honor instead of the more traditional brother-of-the-bride role as a groomsman was an easy one: Gideon is an ally and a close friend, whom she knows she can depend on at all times.
"Look at it," she said, holding up her hands Friday to the almost-empty church. "It's 4 p.m. on the day before the wedding, and he's the only one there."
Gideon recalls his teen years, when he'd sneak back into the family house at 1 a.m. to find Garnet baking cookies. They'd have long talks in the kitchen. Those days may be long past, but they still feel that connection that only siblings share.
"He knows what I need without my having to say it," she said.
"We crack ourselves up," Gideon said.
They decided to do without the traditional bachelorette party. That seemed a little weird for Gideon to throw, but Garnet is happier without it, she said. Instead, they spent the day before the wedding working together to decorate the church. Gideon reminded Garnet that she needed to eat.
As for the delicate matter of the dress: Garnet has agreed to let Gideon skip that part as well. Instead, in honor of their family's heritage, Gideon will wear a traditional Filipino barong, a lightweight embroidered shirt. Because the groomsmen will be in tuxedos on a day when the high temperature is expected to reach the mid-90s, Gideon considers himself lucky to wear the barong, which Garnet had dyed red to match the red roses in the ceremony.
Garnet and Gideon's father, also named Gideon, plan to sing a Philippines song. Chris' Irish heritage will be honored by the Celtic trinity knots on the rings.
Chris and Garnet plan to leave for Maui on Monday, and her brother and his family will return home, but they're enjoying the time they're spending together.
"We're like the same person," Garnet said, "but not in a bad way."
Garnet said her very existence is due in part to her brother's persistence. As her parents tell it, he begged hard for them to give him a little sister. As a 5-year-old, he believed that they could just pick one up for him at the hospital. Apparently, his pleas worked.
"You're lucky," she said, "that I came out as a baby sister."