Day in and day out, the Police Log listings in the Gazette-Times are among the most popular features in the newspaper and frequently rank at the top of the “most-read” sections of our website.
Some of the listings, however, are worth visiting again, and so as 2012 draws to a close, we’re reprinting some the odder entries from 2012’s Police Log.
Names have been removed to protect the innocent — and, OK, the guilty as well.
Signal from the trash
Thursday, Jan. 12: Benton County sheriff’s deputies responded to the landfill for a report of an emergency beacon, installed in airplanes to locate them when they crash, that was emitting a signal. Deputies contacted the owner, who reported she had thrown it in the garbage. The device was activated in the landfill.
Diamonds are forever
Tuesday, Jan. 17: Two 14-year-old girls were arrested for stealing three yellow diamonds, valued at $3,500, during a local jewelry store owner’s presentation about gems to a class at Cheldelin Middle School. The girls reportedly went to a local jeweler to attempt to sell the diamonds — the same one who had given the presentation. He called police. The girls were released to the custody of their parents.
Best cupcakes ever
Friday, May 4: A 22-year-old Astoria man was arrested for disorderly conduct after he reportedly tried to kick down the door of a residence in Corvallis. He said he was trying to get in contact with a woman who lived there who had baked cupcakes.
Surprise slumber party
Sunday, May 20: A 27-year-old Corvallis man was cited for first-degree trespassing after he reportedly entered an unlocked residence and climbed into bed with the people who live there as they slept. Someone already had reported to police that the man had been sleeping near the street and, after waking up, attempted to enter locked vehicles. When officers arrived, they heard a commotion as the residents in an apartment were yelling at the man they’d found sleeping in their bed. The officers assisted the man to his apartment in the same complex. Police said he was intoxicated.
But what came first?
Friday, July 6: A sheriff’s deputy gave a resident on Scenic Drive a warning for allowing one of his chickens to cross the road. No motive for the crossing was provided.
CSI: Egg Vandalism Unit
Saturday, July 14: Two eggs were thrown toward a Corvallis house. One landed on the roof; the other landed on a patio. Officers reported that they were able to determine the direction from which the eggs were thrown by their “splatter pattern.” No suspects were located. Police theorized that it was a random egging.
With houseguests like this ...
Saturday, July 28: A man told police that someone entered his house — possibly through the dog door — and vomited all over his bathroom. The resident also reported that the refrigerator door was open, and he found two cans of beer outside his back door. Nothing appeared to be missing, and there were no signs of forced entry.
Tuesday, July 31: A woman told Corvallis police that she heard a single gunshot from a nearby apartment. Police determined that the sound actually came from a bicycle tire that exploded while someone was attempting to make a bicycle repair in his living room.
A small package of value will come to you shortly
Monday, Aug. 20: A 51-year-old Corvallis man was surprised when he received a package in the mail stamped “return to sender” — with his return address. He was even more surprised when he learned that the package contained illegal drugs — 21.55 grams of psilocybin mushrooms. With a name of “Blackout Promotions” on the front, it was addressed to a California address that didn’t exist. Officers entered the package into evidence.
No jury would convict
Thursday, Aug. 23: A deputy investigating the report of someone screaming from a residence was met at the door by a 53-year-old woman who answered the knock. She told him that she had been cursing at a malfunctioning computer.
And they say etiquette is dead
Tuesday, Aug. 28: A woman told Corvallis police that someone entered her enclosed front porch and took her iPhone, which was on a windowsill. She said a man opened the door to her residence and poked his head inside. The woman said, “Hello,” and the burglar replied, “Oh, hi,” and then took off running.
Somewhere, Bleeding Gums Murphy weeps
Wednesday, Sept. 5: A 56-year-old Corvallis man was issued a loud noise citation after residents of the Grand Oaks community complained about a musician waking them up in the middle of the night. One resident reported that the late-night serenading had gone on for the past four nights. Police found the musician on a walking path at Bald Hill Park playing a saxophone.
Somewhere, The Hulk weeps
Thursday, Sept. 20: A 22-year-old Oregon State University student scaled the exterior of Weatherford Hall and entered a fourth-floor window, but Oregon State Police troopers informed him that by “channeling his inner Spider-Man,” he could face a charge of disorderly conduct. Troopers learned that the student is an avid rock climber and thought that climbing the building would provide a unique challenge — despite the Velcro cast he had on his right wrist. When questioned about entering someone else’s residence hall room, he indicated that the occupants had consented by cheering him on and telling him to climb inside. He was issued a warning.
It’s a little cramped, sure, but the view is nice
Tuesday, Oct. 23: Deputies arrested a 33-year-old Alsea woman on a felony warrant from the Oregon State Parole Board after finding her hiding in a clothes dryer at an Alsea residence. The warrant was issued for a parole violation regarding a weapons offense.
CSI: Shoe Vandalism Unit
Saturday, Nov. 24: During Civil War Saturday, a 20-year-old Eugene man was issued a citation in lieu of arrest for second-degree criminal mischief after an officer reportedly observed him walk up onto the hood and roof of a parked vehicle. The officer stopped the suspect and then compared his shoes to the shoe prints on the vehicle. The officer seized one of his shoes as evidence, cited him and then let him go.
We never see these things in Eugene
Sunday, Nov. 25: An Arco gas station employee reported that a man in his 40s, who was wearing a green University of Oregon T-shirt, ripped the bathroom sink and attached water heater from the wall and attempted to run away with them. When the employee yelled at him, he dropped the items and fled.
If only we had a motive
Thursday, Dec. 6: Members of an Oregon State University fraternity told police that the exterior doors of their residence and 10 vehicles in the parking lot had been covered with hot sauce and other substances. One of the vehicles was covered with transmission fluid. The culprit or culprits also placed a garden hose in the upstairs window and turned it on, causing extensive damage to the carpet and other items in the room.